Back in the real world...

Or is it? Maybe the real world is New York. Or at least I would sometimes like to think so.

Sometimes.

This trip was, of course, a whirlwind of fabulousness! After the typical few days of working and shopping for the store (and me, of course!), we had one day left where the clouds gave way and the sunshine shone down while we wandered Bleeker Street and down through Little Italy. Sublime.

There was, of course, new shoe purchases and some drooling over designer beauties, but I'll save some stories for another day.

The only real disappointment was that, while gazing at the windows at Bergdorf's, I saw that Manolo Blahnik would be in the store to present his collection. Two days after we left.

Woe!

 Ah well, another time.

Thift in Vic (Or: Spring heels & Smurf's Greatest Hits)

One of my favourite things in the world is thift store shopping. Not because I'm a wannabe hipster who will only wear clothes that have been worn by other people until they're useless (or look like they've been worn by other people, but have actually been destroyed and distressed carefully by the manufacturers, so as to warrant an enormous pricetag), but because of the strange things (and occasional treasures) you will run across.

For example, while visiting my favourite lady, Miss Estee, this weekend, I found myself in a Salvation Army Thrift Store in downtown Victoria. The first thing I noticed was the shoe section, which was right in the front (as it should be), and that was where I saw these eyesores:

Not a huge fan of orange and yellow plaid to begin with, I had to stop and giggle when I saw these. Yes, that is a spring in the heel, and, after testing it thoroughly, I will admit that these are probably quite comfortable, as the spring has a good amount of give. That being said, they are a little difficult to get the hang of right away, as they feel a little like walking on Moon Shoes.

Sitting right next to them were these:

A little too Barbie's stripper limo party for my tastes, though Steve Madden (who typically rocks my world, footwear-wise), I can't really question why their previous owner chose to donate them...

And, in case you're concerned that wearing actual bling around your legs in the rain will cause your adornments to rust, I have just the thing for you!

That's right! Chains and bling printed right on to your rainboots! Genius, no?

I joke, but let's move on. Not everything that people donate is worthless, I actually found a few things that I thought fit more into the treasure category than the "oh-my-goodness-why?" category.

These little pumps would be lovely for work, or a dinner out:

With black tights and a pencil skirt? Super cute! Again, these are Steve Madden, though an example of how he does it right, this time!

I've been seeing a lot of geometric patterns, metallics, and, of course, colour-blocking, so these little flats would be a sweet way to run around town in your favourite jeans, while still looking put together.

And, finally, I have a belt that these would go magnificently with, and how perfect for a night of dancing with the girls? Spicy!

Unforunately, none of my treasures fit, which is the chance you take shopping second-hand. One shot, one size. Sometimes you win, sometimes you take photos.

I did, however find something that was a definite one-size-fits-all: a full selection of Smurf vinyls. If only I had a turntable...

Monkey feet (or: the lesser of two evils)

New York story the first: the monkey feet.

As I told you, my mum had been having trouble with her orthotics, and was wearing them in a pair of those Sketchers Shape-Ups (which are pretty much the reason she fell last trip, the soles of those things can be precarious...). She was suffering from cruel and unusual punishment, walking on them 10-12 hours daily, and had had enough.

So, while I was shopping for snuggly sweaters for my man, she snuck into the shoe section and attempted to find something sensible (read: comfy, but inevitably ugly as hell). She found a pair of really awful fleece-lined clogs, a pair of less awful pseudo-Mary Janes in tan leather, and a pair of horrific Fila toe-shoes in baby blue.

Thankfully, the clogs for vetoed, the toe-shoes didn't fit and the Mary Janes made the cut. They worked spendidly... until the next day, when the blisters kicked in.

Slightly enamoured with the toe-shoes (which I had not-so-lovingly dubbed "monkey feet"), she struck out in search of a pair that did fit, and we found them, in Soho. Adidas, this time, which I suppose is a little better...

 

Once we had located the things, we went through a very round-about process of men's sizes masquerading as women's sizes and finally, my mum found the ones that fit her tootsies...

 

And, her feet breathed a sigh of relief, while I promised that I "wouldn't not be seen with her" while she was wearing them.

 

I tried them on, too, a purely academic exercise. I'm not above doing unpleasant research to please my readers.  

 

Verdict? They're weird. I used to wear toe-socks when I was about 12, and these were a lot like those, but more sturdy. I won't be rushing out to buy them anytime soon, but my mum swears they were the most comfy thing she's ever put on her feet. So, there you go... If you're going camping, marathon walking, or need to walk several miles everyday on pavement, these may be for you.

I would most likely hate them less if they were black, or some less-conspicuous colour...

I guess these aren't so offensive... No, forget it, I hate them.

Also, my absolute worst nightmare embodied in footwear was realised during this trip. We were shopping in the massive dollar store, and stumbled upon these:

Not only are they monkey feet, but they're Crocs. Worse, they're foam Crocs from a dollar store. I shudder just looking at them.

One day in the very near future, I will write a post (read:rant) detailing exactly why I despise Crocs (and their wintertime partners-in-fashion-crime, Uggs), but for now, let me just say this: they should be outlawed.

The only redeeming quality about these is that they're childrenswear. Children can get away with wearing the most horrific things and they're still cute. I will admit there was one day where I put on a plaid dress and a pair of bright polka-dot socks, thinking they went together because they were both patterned. Give me a break, I was three.

Not quite like this, but I'll go with it. Think smaller, louder, and more multi-coloured.